Daily thoughts

There is so much but there are two things I'd like to address today:

One, I want you healthy and happy.

Please listen to the conversation with Dr. Levine below. He was a pioneer in sex as a topic of psychology, starting the first clinic for this in around 1974.

Gender is an evolving sense Dr. Levine suggests.

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Life happens for you, not to you. That quote sits here on my screen. It is from Jim Rohn. It is a good reminder. The three second distillation, because sometimes it is that simple.

I am incredibly sad these days. It is much worse to be sad for another than it is for oneself, and maybe it is in part for myself. Maybe it is all about me.

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Dearest Immanuel,

With us is G-D; Praise

I like to think of G-D as love and this is what you bring into our home.

We are blessed by your energy, by your kindness, by your thoughtfulness and by your love.

You like all our children are perfect. Our wish for you is that you always remember that, and that goes for the things you might not feel so good about as well. Your mistakes are perfect, your slips and missteps these are all part of life. Embrace them and learn from them, get that they are as perfect as you are.

It is our pleasure and extreme privilege to have you in our lives. Just keep being you, and enjoy what you have been given.

It's all you'll ever have. Make the most of it.

We love you forever and ever.

Abba and Ima

As I was sitting on the rowing machine earlier, I had some pain on the left side of my chest. I was pretty sure it was just muscle pain from too much rowing, so I just kept rowing. But for a moment I wondered about a heart attack, and that got me to thinking about what I want to leave you with in the event that I do expire suddenly. It's a dangerous world out there, and even when we take the appropriate precautions and make the best of plans, things can go wrong.

So first, you should know that I love you, completely and unconditionally, no matter what, with no qualifications whatsoever, no matter how frustrated or disappointed I may have seemed at times, no matter how stupid a thing you have done, even if it was your error in judgment that killed me. You are all whole and complete and perfect in my eyes. You need no job or grade or approval or education to meet with my approbation. You have it already.

You may have tattoos or piercings, smoke or drink, or engage in risky behavior. It will not affect my love for you in any way. It might make me concerned, scared, anxious or stressed. It might make me age quicker and cry, but you will always be mine.

Second, you should know that I will try to be there for you always. Dahlia says she has been visited by your great-grandfather Max. If I can, I'll hang around for you guys. If I can't take it and just want to come back and play with you all, I will likely be one of your children. Then you can play with me like I try to play with you and you can teach me to sit properly at the table.

Have fun in everything you do. Even doing the dishes can be fun. School can be fun. Hard work can be some of the best fun you will ever have. I do truly believe that Excellence is its own Reward. If you are going to take something on already and devote a part of your life to it, you might as well take the time to do it well. It just feels better. What's more, things done well in the first place often save a lot of time later. This goes even if it is a part time a job, or work or tasks that you hate. Even if you find yourself cleaning bathrooms or collecting garbage, do it with a smile. It will just make you feel better.

As I said, it's a dangerous world. Don't let that stop you. It would probably be better if you avoided certain activities (smoking and drugs come to mind; I also think bungee jumping is just stupid), but sometimes we are drawn to things that are inherently dangerous. If you just have to jump out of plane or climb a mountain or go spelunking, make sure to learn everything you need to do it as safely as possible..

Be bold. Most people are idiots. They can be incredible cowards. Usually they act like lemmings. People are mostly afraid of not looking good. The funny thing is that the moment a person gives this up, he also creates the space in which he can look great. When you don't know, ask. This both impresses other people, and makes sure you know. Again, it can also save a lot of time later. If you lead, people will follow. No one is born anything. It is just what you choose. If you want to make a difference in this world, it is yours to make.

It is said that there are no stupid questions. I believe this. However, there are sometimes stupid teachers. So what? If you have to be in a class or any other place, just do your best to get the most out of it.

Treat people with respect, even stupid teachers, especially when you don't think they deserve it. We have no idea what goes on in other people's minds, or how crappy a day or a life they have had. If you need to, you should also ask them to respect you.

But acting for honor's sake is bullshit. You gain honor through your deeds and knowing that you have done what you believe to be right (which of course includes apologizing if you later determine that you were wrong). Also, don't get too caught up in being right, even if everyone around you agrees with you. It just makes you look like a self-righteous asshole and wastes a lot of energy.

Own up to your greatness, and own up to your failures.

But mostly follow your heart. Do what you love, and do it well, and the rest will really take care of itself.