How we are received is a function of how we be. Mr. Herz takes the position that the basis for powerful and intimate relationships is the ability to see things from our counter-party's perspective and to be responsible for how we occur from that perspective. And while some may see manners as a set of rules the knowledge of which will help them get ahead in certain situations, Mr. Herz suggests that they are better understood as an expression of our concern for others and our desire to connect with the people in our world, and that their cultivation will bring out the best in ourselves and others.